i’m ignoring today’s prompt because my life has been enriched and i have to tell everyone i know about it. i spend my whole day trying to enrich other people’s lives through interacting with them, and i rarely get to have the favour returned. it wasn’t through a conversation or any interpersonal interaction, but my life was straight up en-frigging-riched by the dairy case at target. get ready for this mess because it’s going to enrich your life, too. you ready? okay. look at this:
red. velvet. chocolate. milk.
it’s called “holiday milk”, which sounds terribly euphemistic to me (and was part of the reason why i bought it), and yes, it’s milk so i had to take a lactaid before i cracked it open. but once i did…oh man. i do not like milk at all, but i loved this holiday milky goodness!
it doesn’t taste exactly like red velvet cake but that’s fine. it’s super sweet and decidedly unlike regular milk. one serving recommendation on the side of the carton suggests steaming it (yes!) and serving with whipped cream. i hear other people like hot milk and whipped cream (i don’t, whipped cream is nasty) so try that if you dig it. you can also float marshmallows in it. again, i don’t like marshmallows, but that might work for you. if you are one of those people who likes to dip your donuts into milk (again, GROSS, you people are GROSS), i would suggest dipping one of the strawberry fields donuts from Psycho Donuts for maximum pink food pleasure.
you can’t download any apps on it, it doesn’t have wifi OR 3G, and soorry canadians, it doesn’t come in a bag. but you can get it at target this weekend for $1.79 and i think dany heatley likes it.